im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
