it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
