We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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