glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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