On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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