bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
