Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
