Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
