Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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