I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
