nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
