we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
