i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize