so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
