All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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