Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
