Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Dear god my vagina.
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