My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
So gin and wine won't be happening again
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
