So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
