I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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