I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
