it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
