I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
