Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
