It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
