i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
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