BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
