Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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