just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
