dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
