Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
