I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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