: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
