sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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