just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
