Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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