we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
