he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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