So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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