He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
