My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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