You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
