I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
