Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
