4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
