Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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