Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I think people are normalizing furries
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
