You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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