You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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