About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
