At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize